No tit for tat.

Your employer will always want you to exceed expectations,
but try asking him/her to reciprocate.

10x smoother than what?

10x smoother than what? Watch the TVC carefully, and you'll have he answer. In the almost invisible type which appears below the 10x claim. Try and read what it says, when the ad appears next on TV, before you buy.

What's in a name?

A girl I met at a friend's place pulled this one on me.

"Knock, knock."

"Who's there?"

"Manoj."

"Manoj who?"

"Ma-noj is running."

------------------------------------------

Here's another I thought up on the way to work.


"Knock, knock."

"Who's there?"

"Manoj."

"Manoj who?"

"Manoj-a-trois."

Forehands versus legs

She has legs to die for, and yet Vijay and Alan only seem to have words for Maria Sharapova's forehands. Sigh!

I used to. Now I don't.

There was a time when I used to zip around the garden city on my Suzuki Samurai. Beating traffic signals while amber blinked to red. Ripping past the long arm of the traffic cop even before it emerged from the pocket it was happily settled in. I even fancied 'Jack the Ripper' as a very handy handle.

Then I said "I do", and that was the end of that. I now stick to one lane. I use indicators. I rarely use the accelerator. I stop at amber lights. And so on along that exciting road.

So when the other day I saw these bikes zoom past me, some fond memories came racing back. I was seated in a car, stuck in traffic and the joys of 2-wheeler travel were flashing by.

I smiled. Only till I realised that these flashes weren't happening on the road, but on the sidewalk. I then started imagining pedestrians weaving around to to get out of the way. A la Matrix. And every now and then, a thud.

Ah, the little joys of travel in the city. I smiled once again.

Insights from the loins of the Indian male

A golden yellow liquid. A popular drink among Indian men. And an advertising baseline that makes you wonder why.

"Mera No. 1"

Now I also wonder what might have led the ad agency down this odorous route. What insight could have emerged from the underwear of the Indian male that resulted in this wondrous positioning? The purported medicinal qualities of what flows down under?

Now given the rather sensitive nature of the area under discussion, I'm sure I'm better off not knowing. I'm not a whisky drinker either. So I'll let this sleeping dog lie and wait for you to wake him up.

Managing on time performance

Was at the airport to receive family last night. And as I waited for the plane to land at the scheduled time of 10.25 pm, I glanced up at the arrivals screen for an update.

At 10.15 pm, I looked up at the screen for the first time. It read thus.

Flight number: IT2484
From: Kochi
Arrival time: 10.25 pm
Status: On schedule

Which was all very well. But then the clock ticked past the 25th minute of the 23rd hour of the day, and nothing ticked over on the screen. And so it remained till 11.15 pm, when the plane finally landed and the screen gloriously proclaimed "Arrived".

So what was that routine on the screen all about?

Fiction by Kingfisher while you waited for your flight to land?

Or the efficient management of 99% on time performance.