The butler strikes again

Stephen Bates and his little boy were granted an audience with royalty after the little fellow topped a nationwide talent search.

All was well till the butler ushered them in.

"Your Majesty", he said, "may I present Mister Stephen Bates and his son Master Bates".

"How did you know?" asked an astonished Simon. "The barn's been deserted for years."

Getting it write

I received a message on my phone the other day. From a colleague.

It read, "Hi Manoj, it's hard. I will be late".

But for the fact that it was raining heavily that day, I might have been led to think that I had just received an update on a wet dream.