Sunday, December 17, 2006

Where there is a wall, there is a way

Peeing in public is a very popular sport in Chennai. Wet patches can be found on almost any wall in the city, even on a sunny day. Such is the passion with which it is practised.

The local record for the highest patch is 4 feet and 3 inches. It stands in the name of a gentleman by name, P.P. Peeter. For a while rumours did go around about the record being achieved with the help of a stool. But only till Pee Pee sir (as he fondly referred to by his fans) quashed the allegations by offering to repeat the feat live on national television. This did catch the imagination of the man on the streets, and overnight Pee Pee went from being just another prick on the wall to the city's phallic symbol.

The plan however fizzled out when Pee Pee refused to wear the sponsor's logo. The sponsors didn't understand Pee Pee's stance, and in their defence referred to superstar cricketers who wore logos on the tools with which they practised their trade. It also left their ad agency very disappointed, as they lost out on what they maintained was as an emerging medium of advertising.

So at 4 feet and 3 inches it stood, and still stands.

A few months ago, Pee Pee retired from the sport he graced for over 2 decades. "It's time to make way for the younger lot", he told the press. "In my finest hours, I touched great heights. Now I want to put my feet up." One journo did point out that it would be a lot harder with his feet up, but was tactfully ignored by Pee Pee, who said, "Next question." He also informed the press of his autobiography that would soon be hitting the stands. The Rising by P. P. Peeter.

Pee Pee Peter's son, an energetic 8 year old named Repeeter, following in his father's footsteps, is now making waves on the city's walls.

Will he break the long standing record?

The city holds its breath. In anticipation? I guess not.

1 comment:

shillika said...

This is super funny! would love to read your stuff.. could not stop laughing!